The “Loyalty Penalty” is One Reason Women Can’t Get Ahead at Work

Loyalty can be a strength when leading and mentoring others, but it can also hold women back from prioritizing their own career growth.

A recent study from Duke University shows employee loyalty can lead to exploitation and unpaid work. Unfortunately, there’s reason to believe this dynamic impacts women more than men. A survey conducted in February found that nearly two thirds of women have stayed in their positions in the past 12 months. Yet only 68% of women believe their managers are invested in their career growth—compared to 75% of men.

Time and again, I’ve heard from university advancement clients, mentees, and friends—particularly women—that they would seriously consider staying in their roles, even if they’re not satisfied or challenged, due to their loyalty to their team. Of course loyalty can be a strength when leading and mentoring others, and it can also hold women back from prioritizing their own career growth. I call this the “loyalty penalty.”

The internal struggle that occurs when leaders prioritize their team at the cost of their own advancement should not be understated. In my experience, women leaders’ loyalty to their team isn’t ego or thinking they’re the only one who can do the job well.

Many leaders find purpose in their efforts to strengthen workplace culture, achieve increased metrics, and build a team (or all of the above). Great leaders develop strong connections with their coworkers, and at some point the drive to succeed transforms into loyalty. The issue is that women often feel they need to stay in roles to protect their teams from difficult workplace scenarios, including internal company issues, an overbearing senior leader, or policies and politics that create obstacles to their success.

To be sure, workplace loyalty has benefits. For instance, researchers have found that loyalty can increase work performance. Also, when you stay longer in an organization, you gain experience that helps you become more confident. In some cases, you may be recognized for future growth opportunities because you’ve demonstrated your ongoing dedication.

However, remaining loyal to an organization to a fault can hold you back. Even in the best advancement workplaces, there’s no certainty that a university or academic medical center will reciprocate your commitment, dedication, and loyalty.

The perceived value of staying with an organization often leads women to fear starting over somewhere new and to minimize internal organizational challenges they’re experiencing. Plus, staying at an organization for too long is believed to be one cause of the widening pay gap.

The very skills that workplaces expect from successful women leaders—to be nurturing, supportive, and put others first—often ends up becoming the thing that holds them back. It’s one example of what professor Joan C. Williams calls a “double bind”: the phenomenon when women are expected to behave a certain way and then are penalized for doing so.

Several studies show that companies undervalue women and expect them to choose their strong work relationships over their career advancement. And by presuming women will be loyal to their roles, companies are less likely to engage in proactive recognition, employee retention efforts, or offer raises and promotions.

If you are thinking about the next step in your career, understand that loyalty doesn’t mean forever. Stay in a job long enough to show meaningful outcomes to your organization and stay only while you are still continuing to learn and grow. Your ultimate loyalty should be to yourself. You can love your job and still leave it in order to grow.

And though companies may believe that they benefit from having leaders stay in their roles as long as possible, keeping someone from moving on to the point that they become resentful or stagnant can also cause damage. Instead of having a “loyalty penalty,” we have to start valuing women’s contributions to the workplace—and helping women value themselves.

A version of this article was originally published on Fast Company: https://www.fastcompany.com/90911011/the-loyalty-penalty-is-one-reason-women-cant-get-ahead-at-work